Your Invitation To The Daily Romance
Is the puzzle of your personal life missing something?
Are you struggling with yourself as a result of this?
Is that missing piece called Romance?
Here's something to consider. You may be very happily married or in a stable relationship but romantic words are either not expressed to you, or not often, by your spouse or partner. There is something missing and that something is affecting you and you may not have put your finger on it yet.
If you identify with this please keep reading.
The title of the book "Men are from Mars and Women are from Venus" is a polite way to say we are different! Our needs, interests, hobbies, sporting choices are included in this list. In spite of the many things you could put on that list, we are attracted to each other.
This attraction begins at a very exciting and emotional level before futures are determined. Statistics reveal after a few years the "dream" often hits reality. We all ask why and books are written about those reasons and there seems to be a myriad of answers, and there are.
There is one thing I have discovered over many years of counseling. This one thing is the lack of ROMANCE.
My observations show me this has ongoing consequences in relationships.
Unfortunately, it's the Elephant in the room and one which couples have difficulty discussing. The problem grows and instead of it being a baby Elephant, next minute, it fills the room.
One thing we are wired for is Love. No matter which gender you are, this is a standard Need. Depending upon your gender, Love has different requirements in the way it's meaningfully expressed. Love languages are real.
Romance, I propose to you, is the expression of your love for each other, sometimes in the smallest ways. These are commonly known as Love Languages and are discovered within the relationship as it progresses.
I believe it's the silent litmus test of your development as a couple and yourself. I cover this in far greater depth in my coaching course.
The most significant ongoing consequence of the lack of Romance is revealed in your opinion of yourself. In the conversation between your head and your heart is where this takes place.
There is a tendency to think and believe less of yourself over time. Your self-confidence starts to ebb because we are all wired for the need for affirmation. The interesting thing about this is that affirmation on its own is not enough. You must believe in yourself for it to stick permanently.
I remember a time in my life when I was struggling with who and what I was and started with my own journey of my personal affirmations at the beginning and end of each day. It all seemed to be exciting and going well. I was disciplined and organized with cards that I made up to meditate on during the day.
After expecting positive results, nothing seemed to happen as I had hoped. Maybe I thought my life would be all sorted out and fine and dandy, but it wasn't. Was I expecting too much, I wondered?
After much introspection and talking this over between my head and my heart I discovered the reason. The fact was I really didn't believe any of the affirmations! I loved the thoughts and the words but because my foundation was seriously flawed nothing was built.
It was like building on a foundation of sand and when the negative thoughts came flooding in, my affirmations collapsed. Here's the thing, once I found this out I actually didn't need any affirmations. Some people use these very effectively but I didn't need them anymore.
I discovered I didn't appreciate or honor myself and couldn't take a compliment either. People would compliment me and I would deflect it by making some stupid joke about myself. I was very insecure and was trying to prop myself up with words I didn't believe.
Over time things changed because I made a conscious effort to change the way I thought about myself. I started to receive compliments without being cheesy with my responses. I was able to appreciate and honor myself and know my worth. To be honest, I was probably scared of becoming proud and overconfident about myself.
I remember a man who came to rebuild our boundary fence and we worked together for 2 days. He was going through a difficult separation and was being swallowed up by the trauma and emotions of his situation. All I could hear was his constant berating of himself and all the mistakes he had made. We all know it takes 2 and mistakes are made by both parties.
He needed to be rescued from himself. Here's Phil's testimony.
I met Lloyd in early August 2018. I was recently separated and we formed a relationship over the course of a couple of days, as I constructed a new fence for him. As I shared my situation with him, I was impressed at the lack of well-meaning advice, constructive criticism or empty platitudes. But instead, I found, a person who listened and had empathy for the total train wreck of my life. Someone who always had an ear to listen.
The first piece of gold that he provided for me was “ that I was in a process and everyone’s process is different”. There was no magic pill or plan that worked for all. unlike anything else, I had ever heard. He let me find my personal way through all my own self-doubt, mistakes and revaluations of the motivating negativity that directed every decision and response I had made.
The things that ultimately led me to the point of total wretchedness (that was in my head). Not knowing what was right or wrong and not being able to make any decision because of the conflicting arguments.
He supported me through my acknowledgment of all I’d done wrong, provided insight as I strived for the reason for my actions. And encouraged me when I started to accept myself for who I was. All without that "well-meaning advice, constructive criticism or empty platitudes". Helping me get to a point of not only liking but loving the person in the mirror.
Throughout my whole process of healing, Lloyd seemed to have an in-depth understanding of not only male but also female perceptions and expectations of relationships. I am so thankful for the input Lloyd has had in my learning about myself as I not only gained an understanding of perceived good or bad but in me coming into a mind of total positivity.
Realizing that in all situations, there is good for me. Thank you, Lloyd and I hope that you continue to make positive input into many other's journeys of healing.
I have something for you to consider. I have been writing Romantic poetry for 40 years. My dream has finally been realized.
This membership site, "The Daily Romance" provides members with a Romantic poem delivered daily when you log in to receive it.
Under each poem, there is a relevant quote that is intended to enhance the poem. You will have access to all the content of your membership from when you joined.
Here's an example for you.
Thinking . . .
I am thinking about you.
It's like I can't stop myself!
I find it hard to concentrate on
what I am doing.
You ARE . . .
The ultimate distraction!
How would that look
written on your Resume?
I just wish you were present
in your bodily form
where I could touch you
with my lips.
To inhale your fragrance,
delight in your quirky ways
and laugh with your zany humor!
YOU are . . .
the Ultimate Distraction
Whom I Love.
© 2020 Lloyd Portman - All Rights Reserved
I encourage you to read these poems to yourself as if you received a poem every day from a mystery admirer who placed the card in your postbox. Let these words wrap around you and imagine them being the Romance you are missing in your relationship.
Here's the thing I have noticed, couples tend to relax about expressing their affection to each other yet this doesn't mean they love each other less.
You can now create your own romance daily as it's drip-fed to you and meditate on the content.
Here's what you will receive.
- A Romantic poem each day inside your membership.
- An accompanying quote, usually displayed on an image.
- Access to all content from the day you enrolled.
- Weekly emails containing extra content or bonuses.
I am presenting this membership at a 50% discount today as my launching special.
Your membership will not cost you $29.97/mth but my special deal today is $14.97/mth.